For the longest time, I had a hideous pair of rain boots. But I didn’t care because…well, I don’t care about much other than staying dry when it’s raining. But Sean made such a big deal about the UGLY BOOTS. Every time it rained, he would avoid being seen in public with me because I’d be wearing “those things.” They weren’t even categorized as boots–he would call them things. Like, they weren’t even worthy of being dubbed as boots by the man who wears hideous flannel EVERY SINGLE DAY. God forbid I have one item that doesn’t meet his lumberjack fashion standards. It’s almost like someone wearing Crocs critisizing the Prada shoes you’re wearing. It’s like…”Um, seriously?!?” (and now I’ve angered the Croc wearers)
So, finally after a few years, I sprung for new boots. Sleek, black rain boots. And I have to say…I don’t feel frumpy and gross now when it’s raining. For about a week I sat, staring out the window hoping for rain so I could wear these boots. And then I got my wish. And I got it again. And then it rained every single day last week, including Saturday when I had to shoot a wedding. And all I can say, is THANK GOD I had some rain boots that I could wear for work with dress pants. In this ONE CASE, maybe…just maybe…Sean was right.
The new boots:
The old boots:
So, this wedding happened in July. JULY! And I am just now getting around to blogging about it. Shameful…
Amanda and Ray got married back in July up in the Bronx. It was a little hard to get to from Brooklyn, but somehow me and my directionally challenged ways managed to get there on time. With the help of Missy and google maps.
I started at the groom’s house to photograph the guys getting ready and I rode in the limo with them to the venue. On the way, one of the groomsmen (who shall remain nameless) started whistling at a girl walking down the street. Out of the open window, he asked her if she’d want to be his date for the wedding. Laughing, the rest of the guys grabbed his shoulder and pulled him back into the limo. What followed were many crude (but funny) jokes regarding the sizes of all their manhood. Oh, how I love my job! =0)
So, we arrive to the ceremony and during the portraits before, I make a comment about how Anonymous Groomsman was hitting on random women. At this point, all the groomsmen give me huge eyes…you know the eyes I’m talking about. The “Shut up” eyes. And one of them leans over to me and points to his girlfriend a few yards away. I was pretty sure she didn’t hear anything, but for all I knew her mother or best friend could have been standing next to me.
I cleared my throat. “Oh, I didn’t mean it was HIM hitting on women. It was, uh…” and as I looked at all the groomsmen, I realized they were all married or taken. There was no one else to blame it on except “Me. Yes, it was me. I was trying to pin it on the guys, but wow…er…she was so fine. I couldn’t help myself. Me and my lesbian ways.”
All the guys hollered in laughter. Several fell to the ground laughing. I’m not sure what was funnier–me trying to cover up my blunder…or me as a lesbian. Needless to say, my gratuity that night was fortiful. And it wasn’t necessarily from the bride and groom!
Up until two days ago, I literally had 12 loads of laundry just waiting around…hoping to be cleaned soon. And for the first time in months…literally MONTHS…I had a night where I had no editing to do (well, almost no editing to do) and no other plans. I finally dragged my ass down to the laundro-mat to take care of that god-forsaken pile of laundry. I’ll admit…it was a bit obsene. And I was actually excited because the pile next to my side of the bed was no longer going to smell like a gigantic garlicy belch.
And this is where I start to get the hate mail. The mail that says, “You spoiled brat! You have 12 loads worth of clothes that you don’t even care enough about to keep clean?? Don’t you know that some of us don’t even have underwear?! And we have to scour the streets searching for newspapers to keep ourselves warm during this 40-degree autumn weather! I WILL NEVER READ YOU AGAIN!”
And that’s when I respond with: “Ahh, yes. You poor unfortunate soul who has no underwear and newspapers for a coat. And tell me again–how is it you’re emailing now? How is it you have internet and computer access and all the time in a day to read my blog and comment on every post I’ve ever written? Maybe, JUST MAYBE, spend less of your time scrutinizing my blog and go look for some employment.” And then I’ll get 5 more emails of hate mail because I’M MEAN TO HOMELESS PEOPLE. But I’m not mean to ALL homeless people–just the ones who read my blog and yell at me.
But, I digress. Where was I? Ah, yes. Laundry. So I did my laundry…and it was MIRACULOUS. And honestly…it was even kind of enjoyable. Having nothing to do and no one to bother me for a whole hour and a half? That right there is my idea of heaven. Forget fluffy clouds and pearly gates–the laundromat is now heaven. I went to the laundromat and sat next door at the bakery enjoying a cookie and a coffee uninterrupted while my clothes circulated round and round and round.
However, coming home and having to fold 5 loads of laundry (no, I did not make it through all 12 loads)…was not so much my idea of heaven. ::sigh::
Brody and Matteo are brothers out in Hoboken–which, for the record is one of my favorite places ever right now. It is such a cute little area and seems like a great place to live. Brody is 4 months old and Matteo (they call him Teo) is, I think, 5. Teo was VERY into posing for the camera. He went from one pose, kneeling to laying on his side–I’m pretty sure he would have sommersaulted to stand on his head if I had asked for it.
And sweet little Brody was all smiles for me–well, except when it came time to photograph with his brother. Then I think he was cranky and so over the whole “camera” thing. My favorite is the one with Brody crying and Matteo looking at me–it looks like he’s rolling his eyes at the baby. I love it!
Every time we visit Sean’s family, his mom makes zucchini bread. And it’s some of the most delicious bread I’ve ever had. It’s always so moist in the middle but carmelized on the outside and crust. And in the mornings, she takes it out and puts it on top of the coffee maker so that it heats up while coffee is brewing. HOW BRILLIANT IS THAT??
So, I had asked for the recipe. A while ago. And I just got around to baking my own loaf. And it tasted great–not AS great, but good enough to hit the spot. Only–I have this problem whenever I bake or cook anything. It comes out looking like crap. I don’t know if I just don’t have the correct cooking equipment or what–but seriously? Look at that…doesn’t that look like a big log of poop?
In fact, does anyone remember that movie: Three Men and a Baby II…the second movie where the mom is always trying to cook, but constantly screws it up? Yeah. THAT IS THE STORY OF MY LIFE.
I’m attempting to teach Luna about patience. And what better way to do that than with sunflower seeds…her most FAVORITE SNACK IN THE WORLD. By placing the seeds one by one her nose, I made her wait to eat the rest–only, I think this was better in theory than in execution. In actuality, I don’t think she or Red even realized they had sunflower seeds on their snouts. At least not until Luna jerked her head around, not only sending seeds flying in every direction…but also knocking the bag of seeds out of my hands. Sean tackled Red to the ground and I managed to get Luna in a headlock.
Sean: (breathless from holding the Red down) Maybe we should just let them eat the seeds when they fall?
Me: No. They…(gasp)…must…(cough)…learn…(wheeze)…PATIENCE!
Just then, Luna managed to headbutt me and I had no choice but to release her from the headlock. The dogs feasted on dozens of sunflower seeds and Sean and I were lost in a sea of slobber, tongues and sniffing. So much for patience.
I imagine this is what it must feel like to have children…that is, if your children are hairy, slobbery, hyperactive messes who don’t listen to a word you say. I suddenly feel the need to call my mom and apologize…
A couple weekends ago I photographed promotional portraits forthe sensual Plume de Lune, a burlesque dancer here in Brooklyn. She’s got that cute/sexy mixture that Bettie Paige had. Plume de Lune is actually going to be performing tomorrow night (Friday, October 9th) at Duane Park with live music by Brian Newman Trio. Definitely pop in if you’re in the New York area and check out her performance!